Relationships

Not Two

The Tao doesn’t take sides; it gives birth to both good and evil. The Master doesn’t take sides; she welcomes both saints and sinners.           Tao Te Ching by Lao-tzu translated…

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Poise: The Most Important Gift You Can Give Your Cherished Children

Poised parents create an emotional and intellectual climate that guarantees a vibrant life of  joy and practical advantage for their children and for themselves. Poised parents actually exist and their…

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Want Some Advice? No, You Don’t

Giving advice is a bad habit and it usually doesn’t help the person we give it to. Nevertheless, I gave some advise to a government agency director who had hired…

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Who Was Dad and Who Am I? Poise and the Past Perfect

Warriors, men and women at war with their own weaknesses, make a dramatic turn at a certain point, a conscious pivot away from the past to live in the present…

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How We Rope Others into Our Self-pity and Victimhood

In the last three posts, we’ve looked behind the masks we put on to disguise our self-pity and victim-hood. v     The mask of righteous anger v     The mask of grief…

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Mask # 3: Cynicism and Negativity in a Series on the Many Masks of Self-pity

It is not possible to be poised—present, connected, grateful, creative, or light-hearted—when we feel sorry for ourselves.  But we disguise our self-pity with several masks.  So far in this series…

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Mask # 2: Grief and Regret In a Series on the Many Masks of Self-Pity

We’re examining how self-pity destroys our poise and causes us to live a life half-crazy. Because our self-pity isn’t personally or socially attractive, we have developed masks to disguise it. …

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The Many Masks of Self-pity: Mask #1 Righteous Anger

Over the remaining days of 2013, we will take a look at the chief culprit when we lose our poise and act crazy yet one more time, even though we…

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Rich People and the Problem of Poise

   “It is much harder for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of God than for a camel to go through the eye of a        needle.” Mark 10: 25…

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Poise and Perspective

If we can finally sustain our poise—every day, every hour, no matter what is going on—we can avoid our tendencies to get upset over petty misunderstandings and develop an expansive,…

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